Many singles seem to go from one rebound relationship to the next in search of that ultimate relationship. The only problem is that the vast majority of rebound relationships end as well, which makes daters feel worse then the previous relationship. As someone who worked in the Family Court system, I saw the sad effects of rebound relationships everyday.

THE THINKING BEHIND  REBOUND RELATIONSHIPS

The thinking behind rebound relationships goes like this: “Although my previous relationship failed, this one will be better. This one will last forever.” And so the person just lost one relationship goes blindly into another.

Of course, anyone who has lost love can understand and empathize with people who are rebound daters. Losing a relationship is always difficult, and leaves a great void that calls out for filling. Worse yet, relationship loss due to a cheating boyfriend or girlfriend or outright rejection will lessen an already low self-esteem.

Today, if you are going through pain associated with loss and rebound relationships, remember you have a Precious Saviour who understands where you are, even if freinds and family do not:

Bible Verse of the Day

For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.
Hebrews 4:15,16

One thought on “Rebound Relationships and the Pain

  1. When considering the voids left from a relationship, I think the most important question to ask yourself is “what voids did the relationship fill that should be filled by Jesus?” The time after a relationship should be spent reflecting on the ways that each person gained satisfaction through the relationship instead of find that satisfaction in Jesus.

    How can we heal from a break-up and grow closer to the Lord, rather than bring another person into the mix? The Lord is there for you in the way that you’ve mentioned, but He doesn’t want to just comfort you, He wants YOU. He wants intimacy with you. That means sharing your feelings, your hurts, your burdens with Him and LISTENING to the Lord. Taking time to be quiet before Him.

    When we think about ‘rebounds’ in these terms, we realize that we are really just looking for ways to fill the voids. A rebound is the search for someone else who will coddle our insecurities. To satisfy our emotional neediness. In this way, rebounds become selfish ways for us to “feel better” about our loss, instead of our interest in another person. Many times, what may feel like interest, is really just our need for validation and a sense of security.

    But this security, however, should come from the Lord.

    I’m reminded of Paul’s words in Hebrews, “In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God’s word all over again. You need milk, not solid food!” Hebrews 5:12

    We need to allow Christ to comfort, Christ to fill our voids. That means telling him about our feelings, sharing our biggest fears, being honest with Him about the parts of ourselves that we keep concealed. Until we do this, we will continue to be drinking milk when we should be eating meat.

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